New Year, New website!

Welcome to the new FlyingFox Photography site! After the untimely demise of my old website/photoblog I started rethinking the whole thing. Rethinking the purpose of the website, the blog, and my photography as well. It was all a bit overwhelming and discouraging to really start considering the whole “meaning of life” as it pertains to my photographic passion. To be honest, this had all been on my mind for quite a while, just quietly cowering in a corner and easily ignored. And as these things usually do, it also started me considering the much bigger issues of my own purpose and direction. Hence, the re-building of a simple website turns into the search for meaning of life, the meaning of photography, as well as the meaning of <? and if “before” = pg?then {sucky design} jquery pretty = not.php />.

I sat down with my notebook one night and started trying to plan out the new site by asking myself some really basic questions. The kind of questions that my web design teacher from so many years ago would ask. So, what is the purpose of me having a website anyway? Am I trying to sell prints? Am I trying to sell my services? Am I trying to get noticed by some art director in an office in NYC? Is it just a vanity site to show friends and family that I don’t completely suck at something? Time for some brutal honesty, here. I don’t know. Where do I hope it will lead? I don’t know. What do I want to be when I grow up? I don’t know. Ouch. Okay, so let’s start with an easier question. What am I trying to say with my photographs? Stunned silence. Crickets. Clears throat and stares at the ceiling. Alrighty then! Seems like I’ve got some much bigger issues than just a MIA website.

Perfectionism is my undoing. So many people thing it’s a beneficial trait. It’s not. Perfectionism causes me to think that I need all of the information available to make a decision. It means that I will research something to death then still not make a decision because I can’t find the perfect solution. In this case, it makes me think that I have to have a clearly defined goal in mind before I can start considering layouts. Because, of course, if I’m showing one image at a time (like a photoblog) I would need a very different layout than if I’m trying to display photo essays. So why not find a theme/template that allows for all kinds of layouts? Because I can’t find one that is perfect! So weeks go by while I try to figure out why I even have a website to begin with.

I decided that to actually write and tell a story about some of my images was important to me. So was to sometimes tell a story through a series of images. That’s when I realized what has been missing from my photography, they’re just pretty pictures. Some have stories behind them, but I’m the only one who knows those stories. So now I have a photographic goal for this year, to actually say something with my images. Of course, in my mind, I couldn’t put up images that don’t conform to my new standard. And I haven’t had time to shoot much lately… so the perfectionist in me decided that I need all new material for a site before I could begin. Weeks go by while I try to overcome my photographic version of “writer’s block”.

Meanwhile, in my other life… I’ve been living Life in Limbo for what seems like months now. I’m in the running for a new position at work and getting it would mean some big changes. It seems like every time I try to plan something, the first thought that comes to my head is “will I still be able to do that with the new job?”. So as I’m thinking about the purpose of my site, I’m also wondering if that particular direction will be compatible with the new job. IF I get it. Perfectionism sucks.

I don’t know what it was, or even exactly when or why. But one day recently I woke up and said “Fuggit. Make a decision. ANY decision. And DO something! Declare an Open Major and just build the damned thing!”.

So here goes. There isn’t a clearly defined purpose behind this site. I would like to sell some prints to support my habit and my desire to photograph things that are more than a day’s drive away. I would like to learn to tell stories about my images and with my images. I would like a space to occasionally say something that doesn’t have much to do with photography. At this very moment, I’m not really looking to sell my services. But that could change. The blog posts will sometimes be about a single image. There will be posts that are essentially photo essays with very little written. And there will be some posts about things that I’m working on on a personal level (with pretty pictures to accompany). Best of all… it’s not perfect! Seriously, somehow I’ve managed to let go of my design control freak nature and just let some things be. At least for now. I’ve had to make a lot of compromises in the name of keeping my sanity and getting it done. I’m pretty proud of myself for that. Seriously proud.